Chapter 56: A Dagger and Lingering Shadows

“Everyone should do what they excel at.”

Sharon glanced at the sword cast aside, her brow slightly furrowed.

“You are neither good at nor suited for using that kind of weapon.

Swordsmanship certainly requires skill, but for a young girl like you, such a weapon is too heavy, too cumbersome; it will only become a burden.

You just felt it yourself, didn’t you?”

“Yes…”

I nodded with a complex mix of emotions, offering no argument. I simply watched Aqi effortlessly pick up the sword and return it to his waist, a pang of envy stirring within me.

When I had tried to wield that sword just moments ago, I’d needed both hands to use it with any semblance of fluidity.

“Such a downcast expression…”

Sharon looked at me with a hint of curiosity.

“Do you truly wish to learn how to use a sword that badly?”

Did I truly wish it that badly?

I pondered this silently for a moment, then shook my head.

“Not really. It’s just that I thought if I knew how to use something like this, I wouldn’t be…”

Wouldn’t be bullied?

The words were on the tip of my tongue, but I was quickly struck by the foolishness of such naive innocence.

Truly…

What good would learning do?

What could someone like me possibly change?

Nothing at all…

The indignation I had felt earlier seemed to be nothing more than an impulse. As I gradually processed that emotion, my heart once again bowed to reality.

“Forget it…”

I feigned an air of indifference.

“I was just a little curious, that’s all.”

“Is that so?”

Sharon winked at me, her expression seeming to ask, ‘Is that really the truth?’

However, she didn’t press further. Instead, she retrieved a small object from her bosom and handed it to me.

It was a dagger, short and wrapped in a sheath of brown leather.

“A dagger?”

“Yes, it’s a gift for you.”

She pressed the item into my hand, her tone leaving no room for refusal. “Indeed, you have no talent for wielding weapons. However, compared to others, you possess a lovely and innocent face. This face will make anyone perceive you as harmless, causing them to lower their guard. All you need to do is seize the moment of their laxity and plunge this small trinket into their body. It requires minimal skill or strength, only a ruthless heart!”

She reached out and patted my shoulder.

“Think on it. Perhaps, besides this face, you possess other advantages.”

With those words, Sharon departed with Aqi.

I chewed on Sharon’s final words, falling into a prolonged contemplation.

Beyond this beautiful face, did I truly possess any other advantages?

‘Mommy’s coming to see you…’

Mankha’s dying gaze flashed through my mind.

I looked at the wounds on my fair arm, a sudden realization dawning within me.

Nighttime was a relatively relaxed period for me, especially as Lord Rodd’s personal maid.

Contrary to the information I had gathered previously, Lord Rodd proved to be a diligent ruler, often preoccupied with state affairs. My duties were not burdensome at all.

Currently, my work primarily involved cleaning his room, preparing his meals, and organizing his clothes.

To be honest, these tasks were exceedingly light, requiring hardly any of my energy or time.

Consequently, by evening, after he finished dinner, I had ample time to myself.

Of course, this was all contingent on him not making any additional demands of me, especially ‘those’ kinds of requests that might consume an entire night.

Fortunately, to this day, I had not heard of him making such demands. Instead, he maintained a distance that was both familiar and yet not intimate, leaving me utterly confused about his true intentions toward me.

Having once again left Rodd’s bedroom without incident, and closing the door behind me, I couldn’t help but secretly speculate.

‘He still hasn’t made ‘those’ kinds of demands after all this time… Could this fellow be impotent?’

Due to this thought, as I passed a wall mirror, I couldn’t resist scrutinizing my own reflection.

Compared to when I first arrived, the me in the mirror looked significantly healthier.

The heavy dark circles under my eyes were gone, my cheeks were fuller and flushed with a healthy color, and my arms were no longer skeletal but had gained a soft roundness. Even my chest seemed to show signs of development.

My body’s wounds had all healed, the scabs gone, leaving behind only faint pink marks. If one didn’t look closely, these traces were almost imperceptible.

And dressed in clean clothes, I thought the child in the mirror was quite charming.

‘I’m clearly quite alluring, aren’t I?’

I judged this from a ‘male gaze’ perspective.

Logically, if I were Rodd and saw the child in the mirror, I might initially maintain some decorum, but after two or three days, I would surely lose control. How could he remain so indifferent?

Although I hadn’t willingly become a woman, being repeatedly ignored by him had, surprisingly, stirred up a sense of displeasure deep within me.

‘Tsk, I can’t let him keep treating me like air. I haven’t gathered any useful information while being around him recently, only hearing from the castle maids that the wedding date is nearing confirmation…

Currently, the intelligence I possess includes ‘Moen and the Sherlock family’s relationship,’ ‘the unequal treaty between Listening Wind Town and Clearwater Port,’ and ‘the strange relationship between the Lord and his subordinates’…

Is this information valuable enough? How can I extract more intelligence from him?’

I paced alone in the castle courtyard, repeatedly mulling over this question.

The flagstones beneath my feet shimmered faintly in the moonlight, each step seemingly falling into a rhythm, harmonizing with the night wind’s melody.

A cool breeze brushed my cheek, bringing with it a sense of reverie.

This reverie felt both familiar and nostalgic, as if I had traversed the long river of time, returning to that beautiful modern life.

I remembered certain nights in the past when I often walked under the moonlight with my wife and daughter.

In the night park, the lights were soft, and tree shadows danced. The three of us walked hand-in-hand along the path.

I remembered how my daughter’s laughter was like silver bells, humming children’s songs as she bounded around me like a little rabbit.

While playing with her, I felt my wife’s tenderness and companionship. Our hearts were connected, and life was peaceful. At that time, I felt like life wasn’t so difficult after all.

Another gentle breeze, carrying a shiver of cold, subtly pulled me back to reality from my pleasant reverie.

The moonlit night remained, the tree shadows still danced, but the familiar people were gone, and that bell-like laughter had vanished with the wind, as if it had never existed.

The surrounding air seemed to sense my despondency, growing heavier.

I reached out, my fingertips yearning to grasp that lost warmth, yet only the wind gently slipped through them.

“Sigh…”

I suddenly felt an overwhelming fatigue in my body, forcing me to find a place to sit and rest my heavy frame.

In the surrounding silence, only my breathing and heartbeat accompanied the deepening night.

I thought of Lulona again. In truth, I felt quite sorry for her.

Although I had accepted her as my daughter, it was entirely out of selfish motives.

I seemed to have always treated her merely as a substitute for my original daughter, a beautiful shadow.

Her smiles, her tears, her growth—her own story—yet I had selfishly embedded her into my own memories.

“If I had known about Rodd’s character earlier, and hadn’t overstepped by speaking out against Lord Axas, would I not have fallen to this current predicament?”

I murmured involuntarily, my voice tinged with confusion.

“What do you think?”

From behind me, an unfamiliar and cold voice responded.

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