Chapter 97: Hangover Confessions and Bean-Sprout Soup

I nearly choked on a pasta noodle. Stay calm. What was the big deal about Do-yun staying the night? And yet, the answer that came out of my mouth was the exact opposite of what I was thinking.

“…You have to go to work tomorrow.”

“Exactly. It’s only a ten-minute walk to the office from here. It’s much better.”

I immediately realized I’d reached for the wrong excuse.

“Uh….”

A storm raged in my head for those few seconds. My heart wanted to say it was fine right away, but the scrap of reason left in a corner of my mind condemned it: Are you serious? Is it really fine?

But then, “Reason 2” attacked “Reason 1.”

What ‘problem’ are you talking about? Did you already forget the fateful encounter between Choi Do-yun and Bae Ji-an at the mart a few hours ago? From now on, stuff like that is going to happen all the time. Stop overthinking and just say okay. Every 0.1 second you hesitate, the male lead’s mood is dropping.

Sure enough, Do-yun was chewing his lip just enough to be noticeable. Reason 2 screamed again:

Besides, you’ve already opened your door to him, accepted an expensive gift, and you’re eating together. You haven’t fought, but a reconciliatory atmosphere has been established…. Isn’t it weirder to NOT let him stay? You’ve been way too conscious of him since ‘that day.’ That was just a mistake Do-yun made because he was sick. And we’re brothers! Even if you don’t think so, at the very least, Choi Do-yun believes we are!

In the end, I stood up stiffly. I went and pulled out the most expensive bottle of wine I had in the house.

“Fine. Stay.”

Instantly, a faint look of relief washed over Do-yun’s face, which had been frozen like thin ice. From his perspective, it was just reconciling with an older step-brother he’d grown distant from, so I couldn’t fathom why he looked so desperate.

I acted nonchalant as I filled my glass more than halfway… and downed it in one go. Do-yun looked shocked.

“Hyung?!”

“Ah…. I, uh, was thirsty.”

“Did I make it too salty?”

“No, no, it’s absolutely perfect. Delicious.”

I spoke with forced bravado as I poured wine into Do-yun’s glass as well. Then, I started eating the spaghetti like I was in a combat zone, gulping down wine like water. Surprised by my pace, Do-yun caught my wrist.

“Eat slowly.”

How kind. But I still felt like I wanted to die of shame whenever I thought about the worries I’d spent all last night nursing. That feeling had to be crushed with alcohol.

“No, it’s fine. I usually don’t have anyone to eat with anyway. How about some hard liquor? Since you’re staying, let’s drink a lot. Day drinking is where the real fun is.”

As I spoke, I reached into the cupboard and grabbed the first heavy bottle my hand landed on. It looked like one of the expensive bottles Seung-hee had recklessly bought and left at my place. Do-yun watched me with startled eyes.

“Are you planning to take tomorrow off?”

“No, this is nothing.”

Exactly two hours later, having recklessly mixed fruit wine and spirits, I was slumped in a chair with my eyes half-closed. I felt Do-yun gently shaking me awake.

“Hyung, are you okay?”

“Yeah….”

“Go sleep in the bed.”

He slid his hands under my back and knees. I immediately started squirming.

“No, I’m not going in my room. I’m gonna watch a movie in the living room.”

“I don’t think you can watch anything….”

“No, I’m totally fine.”

Even in my drunken state, I had the awareness that I shouldn’t let Do-yun carry me into a bedroom. Reason 2 mocked me: What a joke. What are you worried about? Then Reason 1 countered: I’m not worried about me; I’m worried about Do-yun.

I insisted until I managed to stumble over and plop down on the living room floor. Leaning my back against the sofa, I habitually grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. An American movie I’d fallen asleep during last time started playing from where I’d left off.

It was about a male lead searching for a female lead he’d met by fate, while mysterious men in fedoras followed him around, sabotaging him at every turn.

Unable to resist my pestering, Do-yun watched for a few minutes before losing interest. He glanced at me—slumped on the floor like a pile of laundry—and asked with a bored face:

“Are you watching this for work?”

“…No, it’s just something I like.”

I answered with my eyes nearly closed. The alcohol was making my brain increasingly sluggish.

Do-yun straightened his posture and asked, “What’s the title? It’s actually kind of interesting. Those guys in the fedoras are blocking the hero and heroine, right?”

“…….”

I decided to overlook his obvious effort to squeeze out a question. Clutching my flickering consciousness, I replied slowly.

“They control fate. Like… messengers of God? But since the hero keeps trying to meet the heroine against his predetermined destiny, they interfere.”

“Does it end in a happy ending, though?”

I felt my eyelids getting heavier as I answered. “Yeah. Because both of them wanted it.”

Essentially, this movie—disguised as a romance—was about how a determined human can change their destiny if they want it badly enough. Watching it, I’d always thought: That’s something that would never happen to me.

Just then, Do-yun, who had one arm draped over the sofa, began gently stroking my hair with his large fingers. I was already dying of sleepiness, and the scalp massage made me even more dazed. As I closed my eyes completely, Do-yun’s voice hummed in my ear.

“That’s a nice story.”

“Yeah….”

Do-yun asked a few more things about the movie. I mumbled answers to everything with my eyes shut. Do-yun seemed to find it funny, because eventually, he started asking completely unrelated things.

“Hyung, am I still pretty to you?”

“…Yeah.”

“Can I come here again?”

“Yeah.”

“Should we live together?”

“…No.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know….”

I was too tired. But the twenty questions continued even into my dreams.

“A long time ago, about nine years ago… did Han Won-ju hit you?”

“…Yeah.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know….”

“Did he do anything else?”

“…He tried to force….”

The air went still for a moment. I heard a short intake of breath from Do-yun. Just as I was about to drift back into a deeper sleep, Do-yun whispered in an even smaller voice. It seemed to be trembling slightly.

“Hyung, do you still think it’s okay to date a man?”

I wanted to say “Yeah,” but I was so sleepy only a raspy sound came out. But Do-yun didn’t seem to want to let me sleep.

“When I was little… why were you so good to me?”

Because you’re my brother….

Suddenly, gravity vanished. The moment the earth began to spin around me, I lost consciousness. I felt like I was floating in the sky, only to be buried in clouds a moment later. When I blinked in the darkness, I was suddenly on a soft bed. Someone lying next to me was carefully brushing my bangs aside with their fingers.

Even in the darkness, I knew it was Do-yun. I couldn’t tell how much time had passed. He spoke in a slightly thick voice.

“…What if I weren’t your brother? Would you have hated me?”

Is this a dream? I wondered dazed. Do-yun grew impatient and asked again. His hand had stopped moving.

“If we were total strangers, would you still like me?”

I answered slowly. “Of course. You… who could ever hate you?”

Do-yun gave a small laugh. “My mother. And probably my father.”

“Tha-at’s destiny, so it can’t be helped. We have to get rid of all the guys in fedoras…. The author too….”

“You really love that movie, Hyung,” Do-yun said in the dream.

Then… a moment later, our lips suddenly met. I think our tongues moved a bit, too. It was an insanely embarrassing dream. Even if dreams reflect one’s inner self, I didn’t know they could reflect such honest feelings. I’d have to forget everything when I woke up to avoid dying of shame….

I fell back into a deep sleep, my mind racing with a million thoughts.

I slept like a log, likely because I’d pulled an all-nighter the day before. They say if the world looks too fresh and the sunlight too beautiful when an office worker wakes up, you’re doomed—and that was me.

I checked the clock: 9:30 AM. My hands were shaking as I clutched my phone, when suddenly Do-yun, wearing loungewear and an apron, opened my bedroom door and walked in with a pretty smile.

“Are you awake? I already told your office you wouldn’t be coming in today. I made bean sprout soup, so come on out.”

“Uh… huh? Okay.”

To make matters worse, I hadn’t forgotten that dream. The sensation of his lips felt so real that I thought I’d lose my mind. I didn’t know how I was supposed to look at him. As I got out of bed in a daze, I realized with a shock that I’d been changed into pajamas.

Startled, I looked in the mirror; strangely, my lips looked redder than usual. Did I seriously lick my lips while having a dream like that last night?! I wanted to die. If I ever drink again, I’m a dog.

I trudged out of the room. When I sat down, I saw a neatly prepared breakfast. He looked at me and smiled.

“Hyung, do you remember anything from last night?”

“…No.”

I avoided his eyes and quickly changed the subject. “Forget about me, but what if you don’t go to work…?”

“It doesn’t matter. The company isn’t going to collapse just because I’m not there.”

I was momentarily stunned by Do-yun’s excessively cynical attitude.