Chapter 5: Don’t Abandon Me

At her continued urging, she finally put down the breakfast table.

There was enough time to clear the few dishes and wash them, but she decided to play along with Miryeong, who was being particularly fussy today.

“We’re leaving.”

Miryeong just stuck her hand out of the big room’s door and waved it around.

It was a gesture to hurry up and go.

Kangeun shrugged her shoulders and left through the main gate, holding Siheon’s hand.

“Why?”

Kangeun tilted her head towards Siheon, who had stopped on his way out of the house and was looking back at the big room.

“Ah, Imo was a bit strange today, wasn’t she?”

“…”

“Don’t worry about what Imo said.

I told you before.

Siheon, you are smarter than anyone I know.

You’re kind and gentle, and even affectionate.

Even if Imo says things like that, Siheon, you have to cherish yourself.”

“What about Noona…?”

“Huh?”

“Am I precious to you, Noona?”

“Of course, obviously.”

At the immediate answer, Siheon’s pupils shone quietly.

For some time now, Siheon had been trying to confirm Kangeun’s affection for him.

But the way he did it was so cautious, unbefitting of a child, that Kangeun found it incredibly pitiful.

“To me, Siheon, you are a very precious person.
I can’t even imagine a world without you.”

It wasn’t a lie.

Her father, who had finally sobered up after living in a drunken stupor following her mother’s death, had left to earn money and she barely saw him two or three times a month.

It was Siheon who had stayed by Kangeun’s side.

The seven-year-old child had now turned twelve.

Siheon, who had needed her help, had grown up and was now helping her.

For the past five years, the two had held hands and fallen asleep together, sometimes even comforting each other.

Now, to Kangeun, Siheon was a precious family member.

“Really?”

“Really.”

At her confident answer, the corners of Siheon’s mouth curved up slightly.

Kangeun smiled back at the precious smile Siheon only showed her, and tightened her grip on his small hand.

“Let’s go.”

“Yeah.”

Kangeun decided to laugh off Miryeong’s whim, which felt somewhat awkward, and left the alleyway holding Siheon’s hand.

As Miryeong had said, Kangeun ate pizza with Siheon and, after a refreshing bath, headed home.

On the way home, the darkness that had settled in wasn’t scary because Siheon was with her, holding her hand tightly.

“Siheon-ah, was the pizza not good?”

“It was okay.”

“I thought you’d like it.
Hmm… what does our Siheon like?”
“Noona.”

The question was about what food he liked, but Siheon gave a completely different answer.
But this was also a familiar occurrence.

‘Which one do you think is the prettiest?’

‘What was the most enjoyable thing today?’

‘What were you doing while you waited for me?’

No matter what she asked, Siheon’s answer was always Kangeun.

‘Noona is the prettiest.’

‘It was nice when Noona asked if I slept well.’

‘I was thinking about Noona.’

Ever since he started talking, Siheon didn’t hide his affection for Kangeun.

Kangeun didn’t dislike the way this kid, who was indifferent to everything for his age, directly expressed his fondness for his noona.

“Aigoo, what a noona-fool.
Not me, I’m talking about food.”

“What Noona likes.
If Noona likes it, I like everything.”

“What’s that supposed to mean.”

Chuckling, Kangeun ruffled Siheon’s hair and looked down at the pizza box in her hand.
Kangeun had eaten two slices, but Siheon had only eaten one, so more than half of the pizza was left.

She planned to heat it up as a late-night snack for her dad and Imo Miryeong, who she hadn’t seen in a while, and feed another slice to Siheon.

“We’re home.”

Opening the gate and entering as usual, Kangeun stopped, sensing that the atmosphere in the house was strangely different from usual.

Was it because of the sky, which looked like it could rain at any moment?
A damp humidity had settled unpleasantly inside the house.

“Imo…?”

The sound of the television, which usually leaked out from the big room, was gone.

Kangeun pressed down the ominous feeling that was slowly spreading and tilted her head towards the big room.

Then, through the wide-open door, unlike usual, she saw a familiar back.

“Dad… is that you, Dad?”

The sight of the large body sitting on the floor, shaking violently, was unsettling.

For the past few years, the big room had been Imo Miryeong’s space alone.

It was a place that her father, Seongho, would never enter, no matter how much Imo Miryeong made a fuss with all sorts of excuses like the lightbulb being out, the television not working, or a bug getting in.

As her confusion deepened, Kangeun read the despair welling up in her father’s eyes as he turned to look at her.

“Dad…?”

“It’s gone.”

Kangeun’s heart pounded rapidly as she faced Seongho, who was looking at her with a vacant expression.

Siheon’s hand, holding hers tightly, pressed down on her cold fingertips.

Feeling the small warmth spreading, Kangeun clenched her teeth.

‘I can’t fall apart too.’

Whatever this new trial was, she had to endure it.

Belatedly, she saw the messy state of the big room over her father’s shoulder.

As if a thief had broken in, two drawers from the wardrobe were lying on the floor, and all the drawers under the television were pulled out.

Kangeun’s surprised gaze automatically turned to her own room.

The situation was the same in the small room she and Siheon used.

All the clothes from the wardrobe were piled on the floor, and the books from the bookshelf were scattered randomly on the floor.

The piggy bank where Kangeun collected her change after grocery shopping was carelessly thrown aside, its empty insides exposed.

And the book where she usually kept a month’s worth of living expenses was wide open on the desk.
The money was gone.

“Dad, a thief, a thief broke in…”

“That b*tch… that Yoon Miryeong b*tch took everything.”

‘I was hoping it wasn’t that.’

For a moment, Kangeun felt her breath catch in her throat and she squeezed her eyes shut.
She was still holding Siheon’s hand tightly.

“Your mother’s insurance money, and all the necklaces and rings your mother cherished.
Yoon Miryeong, that damn b*tch!”

“What do you mean…”

“Sob, that money, what kind of money was that… It was the price of our Hyoseon’s life!
It was money we promised to use when our Kangeun gets married!”

Kangeun had no idea.

It was the first time she had learned that such a large sum of money was hidden somewhere in the house, or that her mother’s jewelry was hidden under the shoe cabinet.

Kangeun barely overcame the feeling of her vision going blank and ran to her father.

In the process, she let go of Siheon’s hand.

It was because her father was just like this now, just like back then after he lost her mother.

Then and now, her father cried like a child with a face that had lost all hope.
Kangeun, feeling a sense of urgency, hugged her father.

“Dad, it’s okay.
It’s okay.”

“Sob, heuk…”

Kangeun, who was patting Seongho as he cried louder and louder, calling for his dead wife, belatedly remembered Siheon and turned around.

Rain was now pouring down as if from a bucket.

Siheon was standing in the middle of the yard with his head down, getting soaked by the falling rain.

“Siheon-ah, Siheon-ah!”

She snapped back to her senses.

‘He’ll catch a cold like that.’

She called out to Siheon, telling him to hurry and come inside, to get out of the rain, and the young child’s head slowly turned towards her.

For a moment, it felt as if the loud sound of the rain had subsided.

Was it because he was wet from the rain, or was he crying?

As she met the desperation in his waterlogged black eyes, even the sound of her father’s crying faded away.

“Siheon-ah…?”

“…I’m sorry.
Noona, I’m sorry.”

“…”

“Ahjussi, I’m sorry.
I’m sorry.”

Why did the words “I’m sorry” sound like a plea to be saved?

It was only later that Kangeun realized the first words Siheon had ever spoken to someone other than her were words of apology.

It was to ask for Seongho’s forgiveness on behalf of his mother’s wrongdoing.

Siheon slowly lowered his body.

While Kangeun was too surprised by the unexpected situation to say anything, Siheon knelt down in the yard, placed his small fists on his thighs, and bowed his head.

And his small, mumbling voice was strangely clear in Kangeun’s ears.

“…I’ll, I’ll do better.
I’ll listen well, and I’ll help Noona more.
I’ll eat only a little, and I’ll be frugal with my school supplies.
Whether it’s delivering newspapers or milk, I’ll do something to pay you back.”

“Siheon-ah…”

“Noona, don’t abandon me.
Don’t abandon me.”

A child of only twelve years old bowed down to her and Seongho as if begging.

Kangeun finally burst into the tears she had been holding back.

****

Siheon was sick in bed for a whole week.

Even while suffering from a high fever, the only words he occasionally spoke were apologies, words of being sorry, and pleas not to be abandoned.

Seongho went to the police station several times to find Miryeong, but he never said what he would do with Siheon.

Part of it was that Siheon, lying in the small room, was out of Seongho’s sight, but it was more that Seongho, consumed by despair, had lost the will to make decisions and handle things.

Miryeong had scraped together everything that was worth money.

It was a relief, if you could call it that, that Seongho had the bankbook where his salary was deposited.

But the sadness of his wife’s traces disappearing was greater than the frustration over the stolen money, and he fell into despair and stopped going to work again.

Kangeun took care of her father and nursed Siheon, and when Siheon’s fever finally broke, she held him tightly.

“I don’t blame you.”

“…”

“I’m actually worried about you.
Siheon-ah, don’t think that you’ve been abandoned.
Okay?”

“…”

“Imo must have had her reasons.”

“…Noona.”

Siheon’s voice after being sick was different from before.

It was cracked and raspy.

Kangeun, feeling sorry for him, wrapped a towel around Siheon’s neck, but she didn’t know that it was the beginning of his voice changing.

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