Chapter 32: The Price of Love

“Are we… truly right for each other?”

They were like mismatched gears, dancers out of step. Forever accommodating and compromising, constantly hiding things from each other, they could never be honest, never be equals. One would always be a beat too slow, the other would miss a step.

This unending cycle of chasing and endless adjustment would only consume all the passion between them, ultimately turning them into strangers.

— A full moon wanes easily, a broken mirror is hard to mend.

That was what Ye Zi had told him that afternoon. Guan Qing himself… had vaguely sensed it too.

He did not want to become strangers with Xie Xu.

Bathed in the twilight glow, Guan Qing reached out, cupping Xie Xu’s face. He tried to smile, yet found himself utterly unable to. His eyes brimmed with an emotion so tender it was heartbreaking:

“Xie Xu, I still love you,” he said, “but we’re not suited for each other—”

Guan Qing no longer cared whether the thesis incident had anything to do with Xie Xu.

Their problems had never been about fame, money, power, or the mundane necessities of life.

No one was truly at fault; their way of loving was simply wrong. In this world, there were so many ways to embrace, yet they had chosen the most difficult, most exhausting one.

“Who says we’re not suited?”

Xie Xu gasped for breath, his eyes bloodshot. He seized Guan Qing’s hand, clenching it tightly.

“You haven’t even tried, haven’t given me a chance to change… How can you know we’re not suited?” His hand, still gripping Guan Qing’s, trembled violently. “Can you please smile at me again, be kind to me again, please…

“Love me a little longer.”

Don’t leave so soon.

Just give him one more chance. He would behave, he would be careful, meticulously hiding all the terrifying aspects of himself that might frighten Guan Qing. He would conceal his sharp edges and possessiveness, bury this anxious heart, and hold Guan Qing tightly in his embrace, protecting him from all harm.

“Xie Xu.”

Guan Qing lowered his head, stroking Xie Xu’s hand before looking up at him. He took a breath, then smiled faintly and said, “In the future, whoever you fall for, remember not to be so mischievous, and occasionally help with housework. Also, you like staying up late filming; when you get back, remember to cook some porridge for yourself. Skipping dinner isn’t good for your health, and they might not always be there to look after you. Remember to respect them, remember…”

By the end, Guan Qing could no longer speak.

His voice grew softer and softer, until he finally lowered his head and covered his eyes. He pulled his hand away and said, “Come see me sometimes in the future. I won’t be moving.”

Xie Xu forced a smile. “What kind of joke is this? Fall for someone else? Who else could I possibly love besides you?”

“You… you’re joking, right?” Xie Xu completely lost his composure, speaking with a flustered helplessness. “We haven’t broken up yet. I don’t agree.”

“Then let’s break—”

“You insist on saying that?” Xie Xu asked, his eyes red-rimmed.

Guan Qing dared not meet his gaze. “Yes.”

“Alright, alright.” Xie Xu nodded, his voice trembling violently.

In the ensuing silence, Xie Xu actually smiled. It wasn’t a joyful smile; if anything, it was a smile of relief, of lightness.

Guan Qing tried to look up at him but suddenly felt his face blanch.

Amidst the confusion, Xie Xu seemed to let out a muffled groan, but Guan Qing couldn’t quite hear it. He only felt Xie Xu’s presence envelop him, making escape impossible. Xie Xu embraced him, resting his head on Guan Qing’s shoulder, and whispered, “Don’t argue in the street. Let’s go home, behave.”

It was an oppressive force.

That trembling sensation slowly crept up his spine again: worry, shock, fear…

“Xie Xu, you… stop this now.” Guan Qing gasped, his face pale. “We don’t need to make this so ugly.”

Domestic violence is either zero times, or… countless times.

When Xie Xu first abused his gender advantage and faced no substantial punishment, the next time he encountered a similar situation, he would again resort to this desperate measure, creating a vicious cycle.

Trapped in that overwhelming sensation, Guan Qing thought despairingly—

He had spoiled Xie Xu.

The spot was incredibly secluded. Xie Xu glanced around, then sent a text to his assistant, asking them to drive over. He licked the side of Guan Qing’s neck, remained silent for a moment, then whispered, “What’s wrong? I’m not making a fuss. I’m being intimate with my boyfriend, is that bothering anyone?”

“I’m not your boyfriend,” Guan Qing said, his face pale.

Xie Xu stiffened, then quickly broke into a smile. “Right, you’re my wife. My mistake.”

“Let’s break up,” Guan Qing managed to summon a sliver of clarity.

He had to cut his losses in time.

Xie Xu remained silent. After a long pause, Guan Qing, struggling through his weakness and confusion, managed to turn his head and look at him. He noticed a strange expression on Xie Xu’s face.

Relief, malicious pleasure, madness, and… suppression, pain.

Guan Qing frowned. He felt a liquid running down Xie Xu’s hand onto his neck.

Xie Xu covered his eyes and kissed him. “You.”

“You… what are you trying to do?” A bad premonition welled up in Guan Qing’s heart.

Xie Xu remained silent.

****

Ye Zi opened the car door and walked over.

Guan Qing felt himself being held tightly, then pulled back a step. He looked at Xie Xu, forcing a smile.

The second before losing consciousness, Guan Qing saw Xie Xu saying something, a two-word phrase.

What could it have been?

Guan Qing wondered dazedly.

And that viscous, slightly rusty-smelling liquid on his neck—

What… was it?

****

Ye Zi looked at the location Xie Xu had sent on WeChat, then pressed the lock screen.

Xie Xu now appeared utterly disheveled—his face was deathly pale, his hands covered in blood, his palms gashed open by his own doing, the small knife lying on the ground.

Ye Zi carefully placed Guan Qing in the back seat of the car, then calmly walked back, smiling at Xie Xu. “How does it feel? Handing him over to me yourself?”

At this moment, Ye Zi was the only one Xie Xu could turn to—someone who could handle an enraged Alpha and arrive in time to prevent him from harming Guan Qing.

Ye Zi clearly understood everything. After dropping off Guan Qing, he hadn’t left at all, waiting to reel in his net.

Of the two men, one was impeccably dressed in a suit, while the other was disheveled and pale. Yet, Xie Xu stood ramrod straight, his overwhelming presence and pheromones difficult to contain, as he calmly met Ye Zi’s gaze:

“What isn’t yours, you cannot take.”

Ye Zi scoffed. “If it’s not mine, then is it yours?”

“Don’t forget,” he glanced at the car, “what you just did.”

This was not merely a matter of disappointment.

Guan Qing might even come to despise Xie Xu, or even… fear him.

Xie Xu refused to think further.

Ye Zi waited for Xie Xu to lose control, to erupt in rage, to lose face. He smiled as usual, possessing every right to arrogance. He could even look at Xie Xu—this pathetic man who had lost everything—from the corner of his eye, watching him struggle in vain, just as he had countless times before—

Xie Xu smiled.

“I don’t understand.” Ye Zi smiled casually, noncommittally.

“I thought it was strange earlier, at three in the afternoon, Wang Yun was still asking people to serve dishes.” Xie Xu took a breath and chuckled, “I didn’t eat a bite, but I didn’t expect… if I’m not mistaken, the substance was added to the scent?”

After their last encounter, he had sworn to himself.

If he ever harmed Guan Qing again because of it, he would leave Guan Qing far behind, never to see him again for the rest of his life.

He couldn’t let anyone or anything harm his precious darling, whom he held in the palm of his hand. Not even himself.

But ever since leaving Wang Yun, his emotions had been noticeably agitated.

At first, he thought it was due to Wang Yun’s actions, but that frenzy and anger were truly too intense and abnormal. In reality… only the effects of drugs could achieve such a result, right?

Ye Zi had specifically reminded him to go home. Ye Zi’s precise control over every timeline, Wang Yun rarely lost her composure but spilled a plate of sauce, and he, who always drove carefully, hit a utility pole—

Everything happened for a reason.

Ye Zi adjusted his collar and slowly smiled. “You’re trying to trick me into talking, recording this? Again, your mother arranged a meal for you, what does that have to do with me?”

“The surveillance footage from your meeting with Wang Yun wasn’t completely deleted, and the owner of that restaurant happens to know me. Also…” Xie Xu spread his hand, showing him a small glass bottle.

Inside the bottle was a dark brown liquid, the exact color of the sauce Wang Yun had spilled that afternoon.

“Science is so advanced now; any component can be identified with a quick check, right?”

Xie Xu tossed the small bottle into the air, caught it in his palm, and whistled, smiling at Ye Zi.

“If you wanted to do something, you would have done it long ago, right, Senior?”

Ye Zi’s pupils constricted.

Xie Xu’s gaze filled him with intense disgust.

How dared Xie Xu look at him like that? At this moment, Xie Xu was clearly the one in control, yet he displayed such a scornful, self-assured look, as if he saw through everything.

For a moment, Ye Zi felt a long-forgotten surge of anger.

“Quite the idol persona, aren’t you? You want him to look up to you, want him to adore you, always maintaining that ‘life mentor’ facade, leading him astray, and constantly playing dirty tricks.” Xie Xu scoffed.

Give him hope, give him a seemingly within-reach future, guide him, inspire him, and then…

Destroy him.

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