Chapter 42: Snowfall in Prague

The sky was a deep shade of blue, spread out across the view like oil paint splashed across a canvas.

Czechia seemed to have just experienced a snowfall, the whole world blanketed in silver-white. Small houses huddled intimately together, their rooftops covered in snow. Women in aprons chatted in Czech through open windows—ordinary and warm.

Xie Xu carried him slowly forward. A few snowflakes clung to his hair, the tip of his nose red from cold, his eyes glistening like glass under the sunlight.

After that kiss, he said nothing more. He only tightened his arms around Guan Qing and walked on in silence.

Perhaps he felt guilty.

Guan Qing didn’t know what to say either.

When he first opened his eyes, the brief, overwhelming joy had gradually faded, memories slowly converging.

Whatever the reason, Xie Xu had… hidden things from him regarding his mother.

He couldn’t forgive, but he couldn’t abandon Xie Xu either. Thus, he was caught in a dilemma.

Xie Xu looked down at Guan Qing, pulled up his scarf to cover most of his face, leaving only the tip of his nose exposed for breathing, and said, “I’m sorry.”

They fell silent again.

Only then did Guan Qing realize that in the dead of winter in Northern Europe, outdoors, he hadn’t felt cold at all—he was wearing thick clothes, including a scarf and ear muffs. The clothes were a bit ill-fitting, carrying a trace of Xie Xu’s fresh scent.

He glanced at Xie Xu again: he wore only a thin sweater, no scarf—no wonder the tip of his nose was red.

For an instant, Guan Qing’s heart ached so much he couldn’t speak.

Xie Xu was extremely nervous, stealing a glance at Guan Qing and seeing his deep frown. Xie Xu’s arms stiffened; he managed a forced smile.

Fortunately, the house soon arrived—a family guesthouse with ample heating inside. The house was small but warmly decorated, with a fireplace burning. A group of people, men and women, old and young, sat around the fireplace, chatting and playing cards.

They greeted Xie Xu and said something in Czech.

Xie Xu smiled and replied. Those people gave them ambiguous looks. An elderly woman came up, shook Guan Qing’s hand, and handed him a piece of chocolate.

Guan Qing, not understanding, took it and thanked her repeatedly in English. Whether the old woman understood or not, she left with a smile.

They arrived at Xie Xu’s room. It was small and messy. Xie Xu’s suitcase lay wide open on the floor, the double bed unmade, various documents and sundries scattered across the bed.

Xie Xu rubbed his nose and cleared a spot on the bed for Guan Qing, saying, “Sit.”

But Guan Qing didn’t sit.

Xie Xu pulled over a wooden stool and sat down. His sweater was damp from melted snow. He placed his hands on the hem, as if wanting to take it off, but after a glance at Guan Qing, he let go.

Guan Qing didn’t sit, didn’t say anything. He just stood there watching Xie Xu until Xie Xu’s head gradually dropped.

Xie Xu whispered, repeating like a broken record, “I know I was wrong. Sorry, sorry, sorry…”

Guan Qing’s heart ached even more.

He had no choice but to interrupt Xie Xu: “Weren’t you going to take off your clothes? Why didn’t you?”

Xie Xu looked up at him, eyes watery, innocent and pitiful like a big dog. Hearing Guan Qing’s words, his face flushed suspiciously.

Guan Qing: “…”

“I mean,” Guan Qing bent down, wanting to lift his hem, but Xie Xu grabbed his hand tightly, “Let me take a look.”

Xie Xu blushed and said, “I-I’ll prepare first. Let me take a shower, just now… well… oh, I’ll go downstairs to buy a condom.”

He grabbed his hem like a bashful girl and hurried toward the door, but Guan Qing caught him.

“Xie Xu.” Guan Qing’s tone was very serious. He looked at Xie Xu, his eyes unblinkingly fixed on him.

Xie Xu had to meet his gaze. He wanted to escape, but soon seemed to fall into Guan Qing’s eyes, gradually showing a look of fascination.

Then Guan Qing stood on tiptoe, tilted his head, his breath mingling with Xie Xu’s, eyelids half-lowered, the expression in his eyes unclear.

It was like a posture for a kiss.

Xie Xu stood still, almost stunned. He subconsciously closed his eyes, waiting—

Guan Qing reached out, and while Xie Xu’s attention was diverted, he lifted Xie Xu’s shirt.

When Xie Xu reacted, Guan Qing was half-crouching, staring at the bandage on his abdomen with a deep frown.

In this small town, there weren’t many places to park. When carrying Guan Qing from the parking spot to the guesthouse, it was too cold on the way, and Xie Xu hadn’t noticed—his wound had split open. Now the white bandage was stained with quite a bit of blood.

Xie Xu felt awkward, wanting to rub Guan Qing’s head but afraid of being too bold.

“Is that so?” Guan Qing turned his eyes to look at him, his expression very grim.

Guan Qing looked at him expressionlessly.

Xie Xu dared not look at him anymore, staring at the ground. After half a minute, he said quietly, “Touch it again. It doesn’t hurt now, really.”

“You—”

Guan Qing was so angry he couldn’t speak. Xie Xu stole a glance at him, like a mischievous child being scolded by the teacher, murmuring, “I was wrong. Yell at me if you want, but please don’t say things like breaking up.”

Guan Qing turned his back to Xie Xu. His back trembled slightly. He raised a hand to wipe his eyes, let out a long breath, then turned around and said calmly, “Okay, I won’t in this lifetime.”

When Xie Xu understood, his eyes slowly lit up. He wanted to reach out and hug Guan Qing, but then he saw Guan Qing—

He froze.

That second stretched into a long moment. Xie Xu suddenly felt a severe ringing in his ears. Amidst the ringing, he heard his own unnaturally rapid heartbeat. Something stuck in his throat, unsaid.

A snowflake drifted silently, sticking to the glass window, watching everything.

—Guan Qing opened the knife sheath and slashed his own palm twice. Instantly, skin and flesh turned outward, blood flowing out.

The blood was like an answer, winding down. Xie Xu felt the world spin, an intense sense of unreality.

Guan Qing’s face was pale, his hand drooping, twitching unnaturally, blood dripping down his fingertips. He smiled at Xie Xu and said, “If you hurt again from now on, I’ll hurt with you.”

Xie Xu’s expression went blank for a long time, as if he couldn’t react to anything in the outside world.

The next second, his eyes reddened and tears fell. His hands trembling, he carefully cradled Guan Qing’s palm, his whole body convulsing with grief. He lowered his head, letting out the whimper of a trapped beast.

Guan Qing stayed silent. Finally, he smiled, gently patted Xie Xu’s head with his right hand, and said, “It doesn’t hurt. Really, it doesn’t.”

“You…” Xie Xu sniffled, his voice shaking badly. “I do hurt now.”

Xie Xu tried to force a smile but couldn’t. In the end, he covered his eyes and sobbed, “This hurts too much… I can’t bear it.”

He trembled all over, as if very cold, tears streaming down. He didn’t even dare touch Guan Qing anymore; he knelt beside him, calling the doctor.

Guan Qing took the first-aid kit and barely treated his own wound, then helped Xie Xu up with his uninjured hand.

He looked at Xie Xu, his eyes both tender and calm, almost inhuman. He smiled and said, “This wound looks scary, but it really doesn’t hurt. Want to touch it?”

Xie Xu, eyes red, shook his head and whispered, “Don’t… be so cruel.”

“You were cruel to me first,” Guan Qing said quietly.

The doctor arrived quickly. Fortunately, Guan Qing had not fully recovered from his illness and lacked strength, so the wound, though long, was not deep. Still, the doctor rambled on in Czech, giving a long list of instructions that Guan Qing couldn’t understand.

Guan Qing listened in a daze, nodding repeatedly. Xie Xu, however, listened intently, his face pale.

After the doctor finished, she treated the wound and prescribed medicine. Before leaving, Guan Qing called her back.

Guan Qing glanced at Xie Xu, who, though still red-eyed, immediately understood Guan Qing’s intention.

He lifted the hem of his shirt, pointing at the blood-stained bandage, and said to the doctor in English with a nasal voice, “This wound accidentally opened. Could you please help treat it?”

The bespectacled, blonde female doctor was very displeased. Her look at them seemed to say, ‘Neither of you is reliable. You’re perfect for each other.’

After finally finishing the treatment, the doctor left.

Once the door closed, Guan Qing looked at Xie Xu. “Can we talk properly now?”

Xie Xu placed a soft cushion under his hand, carefully confirmed that Guan Qing was comfortable in every way, then nodded, looking distracted.

Xie Xu sniffled and asked, “Before we get to business, can I—”

“Yes.”

Guan Qing couldn’t use his left hand, so he opened his right arm in an embrace, his eyes curving.

His gaze was very gentle now, completely non-aggressive, peaceful and firm. Xie Xu hugged him carefully, as if holding a treasure, burying his face in Guan Qing’s neck, still trembling intermittently.

Guan Qing was stunned, about to say something.

He felt a cool wetness at his neck. Xie Xu… was crying again.

.

“So, Guan… what was his name… ran off to Prague?”

“Ms. Wang, his name is Guan Qing.”

In the video call, the blonde female doctor reminded her. Her Chinese was perfect, with proper pronunciation.

“Hmm, Guan Qing.” Wang Yun tapped the table, squinted, and sneered. “What’s the use of him going? A useless burden.”

Wang Yun leaned back into her chair. Before her was a huge screen, showing several images simultaneously. One image was the downstairs of the family guesthouse—Xie Xu was vigilant; he had discovered the surveillance in the room. Another showed a bedroom, where a woman with a delicate, gentle face was playing chess with her husband, the two chatting about something.

After so many days, Ye Anxian must have sensed something.

She was a smart woman.

She maintained a facade of calm, only once, when terrified to the extreme, she called Guan Qing—that time, she and her husband were returning from the market to the hotel at night, followed all the way by a car that suddenly accelerated, nearly killing them both. But after that, she pretended to be calm, happy, enjoying her vacation. She knew nothing of the situation, but she knew… she had to protect her family.

A single Ye Anxian wasn’t worth Wang Yun’s attention. But the series of things behind Ye Anxian—

“Also, ma’am, I must remind you… Mr. Xie Qing did not go to the United States.”

Wang Yun’s hand on the armrest trembled.

Her voice hoarse, she asked, “Then… where did he go?”

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