Chapter 22: A Gift With Strings Attached

Only after they reached the dining table was the Emperor’s grip finally released.

Haeryeong sat across from him with the round table between them.

“Let us eat.”

As the man prepared to begin the meal, Haeryeong felt as though he ought to do something.

Should he pick up side dishes for him as the Noble Consort did?

No, now was not yet the time.

Even if he changed his behavior, the Emperor would not let go of his thread of suspicion.

Haeryeong’s nerves were stretched to their limit, as even letting out a single sigh felt like something he had to do while watching the man’s reaction.

The only saving grace in this situation was that he had been trained since childhood to never reveal his heart.

Of course, being human, he couldn’t hold it all in every time, but he was accustomed to navigating such tension, so it was endurable.

“The Founding Festival will begin in the Blue Moon—May.”

The Founding Festival was a celebration commemorating the nation’s establishment during the season of peach blossoms.

The banquet he had seen at the Dohwa-gak Pavilion was part of this festival, which usually lasted three to five days with continuous celebrations.

During that period, even commoners stopped working to participate, leaving the capital in a state of constant excitement.

Until last year, Haeryeong had been busy preparing items to distribute to the people before the festival.

Had time really passed so quickly while he was ill that he hadn’t given it a single thought this year?

“What takes place during the Founding Festival?”

When Haeryeong asked, feigning ignorance, the Emperor explained.

He described it as a flower festival held around the anniversary of Yeoran’s founding.

“There will also be hawking this year.”

“Last year, we skipped it because the Office of Falconry did not have enough hawks of the right age, but this year, we have several chojini.”

The Emperor paused as if in thought, then smiled brightly at Haeryeong.

“Do you not practice hawking in Yeonseo?”

“No. Hawking is quite frequent in Yeonseo as well.”

“The commoners catch and tame young hawks during the summer, then hunt with them in the winter to supplement their food supply.”

“Has the Empress ever tried hawking?”

Haeryeong shook his head quietly.

“In Yeonseo, Eumin are not permitted to hunt with hawks.”

“I have rarely even stepped outside the royal palace…”

“Oh dear. Then how about participating in the hunt this time?”

“There is more than a month and a half left, so choose a hawk you like and tame it.”

“The basic training is already done, so you simply need to familiarize the bird with your face.”

Haeryeong blinked his wide eyes in surprise.

Hawking.

Since childhood, he had only ever watched his siblings tame hawks, so he had desperately wanted to try it himself.

But was he truly allowed?

When the opportunity was actually laid out before him, it seemed human nature was to hesitate.

To think he was wavering before the very thing he had admired for so long.

Human hearts are truly impossible to predict.

Since he had no way of knowing what the man was plotting by granting this permission, it was difficult to answer blindly.

As Haeryeong worried without answering, the Emperor urged him.

“Do you not wish to do it?”

“It is not that… Is it truly alright for me to do so?”

The Emperor tilted his head in bewilderment.

“In all the world, I am your only superior, and I have given my permission, so what is the problem?”

Haeryeong’s lips fluttered, but he could not easily find an answer.

If asked if he wanted to do it, the answer was obviously yes.

But could he really agree to do as the man said?

Wetting his parched lips, Haeryeong squeezed his eyes shut, unable to withstand the pressure of the Emperor waiting for his reply.

“I shall do it.”

“To think it was this difficult to hear an answer.”

Haeryeong bit his lip at the Emperor’s grumbling, then let out a small, shy smile.

No matter how much he pretended to be mature, he was still a young man of twenty, an age where such things were naturally exciting.

Seeing Haeryeong’s smile, the Emperor nodded with a lukewarm expression.

“Very well. I shall send word to the Office of Falconry.”

“After lunch tomorrow, I will assign a few members of the Black Shadow Unit to you, so you may go together.”

“Your grace is as vast as the sea.”

The Emperor interlaced his fingers and rested his elbows on the table.

“Is it that good? Your face has finally brightened.”

To be honest, it was good.

He had almost never seen another person’s hawk up close, so he was filled with anticipation.

In Yeonseo, he had always watched from a great distance.

“Yes. I am very happy.”

“If the Empress is happy, then I am happy as well.”

He felt as though he could let the man’s hollow words slide today.

Having lived almost his entire life trapped in palaces, the thought of going to a hunting ground was thrilling.

He knew in his head that this was not the time for such things.

However, even if he were deposed, he would likely be confined to a cold palace or an empty estate in the capital; he would never truly be a free man.

So just this once, just one single time.

Would it not be alright to breathe some outside air?

Would it not be alright to act like a child for just one last time?

With that resolution, he felt he could breathe a little easier.

But there was one thing Haeryeong had overlooked.

The fact that the Emperor was not a man to grant such a thing without a reason.

He should have realized it the moment the man dangled such a large bait.

He had been far too shortsighted.

****

“Should we not prepare for your heat cycle?”

The Emperor, having entered the bed, created a difficult situation by using the upcoming heat cycle as an excuse for his advances.

He should have used the excuse of a long walk to go to sleep first.

Knowing the Emperor would come, he had been forced to wait, and now the man drew close, caressing his waist beneath the quilt.

“Since I made you happy this evening, you should make me happy tonight.”

“That is how the math works, is it not?”

“Must we… keep a tally between husband and wife?”

Haeryeong backed away to escape his hand, but he soon hit the wall; there was nowhere left to go.

Cornered, Haeryeong gripped the collar of his sleeping robe tightly.

“Is that not what affection is? If something is given, something must be returned, and only when something is returned can something else be given.”

For the first time in his life, Haeryeong felt the urge to hurl insults.

He wanted to demand if the man had brought up hawking earlier just to set up this move.

He wanted to ask why the man was here instead of going to the Noble Consort to be made “happy.”

He hadn’t realized before how stifling it was to have to suppress the words he wanted to say.

Back then, the Emperor never came near him, so there were no words to say and none to suppress.

It was much better when he stayed far away.

Realizing how much the distance between people mattered, Haeryeong bit his lower lip.

The man’s hand delved beneath his sleeping jacket and caressed his waist, but resisting was futile.

Haeryeong’s body went rigid as a faint sense of shame began to surge within him.

His shoulders shivered at the touch of the man’s hand on his bare skin.

As they were husband and wife, he had no justification to refuse the touch.

‘What do I do?’

He watched the man approach with a trembling gaze, then closed his eyes.

Rather than provoking his anger and being treated brutally, perhaps it was better to remain submissive while he was acting this way.

Haeryeong steeled his heart with a feeling close to resignation and lifted his trembling chin.

The man’s chuckling breath tickled his nose as he drew close.

His lips touched and pulled away, slowly.

Then, a moist, warm sensation traced over his trembling lips as if to soothe them.

The scent of peach blossoms billowed out, making him feel as if his breath were catching.

The man pressed his lips against Haeryeong’s as the latter inhaled a jagged, sob-like breath.

Holding his lips and then releasing them, the Emperor kissed him by interlocking their lips and rubbing them gently.

When he pulled away slightly and Haeryeong opened his eyes, he met a gaze that held a faint smile.

Haeryeong quietly scanned the man’s face.

He saw the tender expression the Noble Consort must have looked upon all this time.

It was so absurd that the man was forcing this upon him now when he didn’t want it, after refusing it when he had once craved it, that an involuntary laugh escaped him.

The man smiled back and kissed him more deeply, his hand beneath the robe moving stealthily.

The touch tickled the small of his back, sending a chill through him and making his breath hitch.

As he received the gentle caress along his spine, Haeryeong stared at the Emperor’s lips which had just pulled away.

The lips, glistening with saliva—whether his or the man’s—narrowed into a crescent-moon smile.

‘Do not smile.’

Haeryeong whispered in his heart as he exhaled a sharp breath onto the man’s approaching lips.

‘Do not smile like that.’

‘How can you smile like that while humiliating someone?’

‘How can you smile while doing this without sharing even a fragment of your heart?’

The Yangin energy the man emitted began to spark a small fire somewhere inside his body.

Contrary to his churning heart, the fire grew steadily.

The “kindling” the man carelessly threw in seemed to rake across a place that should never be touched, making his insides ache.

Unable to withstand the stinging pain, Haeryeong clung to the man’s sleeping robe.

A pain he couldn’t even accurately define began to slowly tear through his internal organs.

As the kiss deepened, the pain intensified.

It felt as though his stomach were being twisted.

Cold sweat began to break out, and the Emperor—having noticed as he caressed Haeryeong’s back—pulled his hand away with a look of confusion.

“Empress?”

Haeryeong exhaled a ragged breath and sat up, leaning his back against the wall.

Had he held his breath for too long?

His head felt light, and his consciousness flickered.

“What is the matter? Hmm?”

“I am… simply too tense.”

The strength left the hand that had been clutching the man’s collar.

His arm dropped, and he felt as though he couldn’t move a single fingertip of his own accord.

Even swallowing the dry saliva in his throat felt like a struggle.

His entire body felt languid, and his narrowed vision began to blur.

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