Chapter 36: Held by the Reins

But what else could he do?

Letting out a quiet sigh, Haeryeong wiped his wet eyes with his sleeve and tried to steady his heart.

He pulled out the apple he had prepared and handed it to the horse.

It was the feeling of giving an extra treat to someone he despised just to keep them quiet.

The horse munched on the apple with a crunching sound, tossing its head as if it were delighted.

‘Why does even this look so spiteful?’

Haeryeong clicked his tongue in a complicated mood as he looked at his messily dampened hair.

“If you do this again, I shall never bring you another apple.”

Nureongi blinked its large eyes and tilted its head.

‘Does it not understand?’

Horses seemed to be even more dim-witted than he had thought.

Chang-i, at least, hadn’t seemed this stupid.

Looking back, he saw Changcheon, who was being held by Su-yong, standing stiffly and frozen.

“Remove Chang-i’s hood.”

At Haeryeong’s command, Su-yong took off the hawk’s hood.

Directing its clear yellow eyes toward Haeryeong, Changcheon let out a low, gurgling cry.

‘How stifling it must be to have its eyes covered and its feet bound like that.’

Haeryeong tried to ignore the reason why he felt such a particular kinship with Changcheon.

It was likely because his own situation, feeling a sense of shared identity with a hawk, was so lamentable.

With the stable master holding the reins and Su-yong supporting his foot, he was able to mount the tall horse with reasonable ease.

Terrified by the height, which was entirely different from the pony he had ridden as a child, he hunched his back; Nureongi, seemingly startled by the weight of a person, stomped its hooves.

When he reflexively pulled the reins, the horse only stomped its feet even more violently.

Seeing the swaying Haeryeong, the stable master calmed the horse and offered advice.

“Your Highness. You must grip the horse’s torso firmly with your thighs.”

“Keep your back straight and ensure your upper body does not wobble.”

‘Easier said than done.’

Haeryeong was losing his mind trying to stay balanced atop the horse that was still moving restlessly.

All he could do was grip the reins as if they were his very life-line.

Only after the horse finally settled into a stop did he manage to straighten his back.

Following that, the stable master corrected his posture several times.

Once he applied strength to his feet in the stirrups and tightened his thighs, he felt as though the shaking had become more manageable.

However, this creature called a horse possessed so little patience that it soon began to stomp again and toss its head vigorously.

“Stay… stay still.”

Every time the horse moved, the private area where he touched the saddle throbbed with a dull ache, causing Haeryeong’s face to turn ashen.

The stable master spoke up on behalf of the animal with a troubled look.

“Your Highness, if you only make him stay still, you cannot practice.”

‘That is true.’

But how was he supposed to practice when the beast was acting so wildly before he could even get his bearings?

“Nureongi. Just for a moment, stay still. Must you not give me time to get used to this?”

Every time the horse moved, his head jolted, making his stomach feel increasingly nauseous.

Gripping the saddle tightly, he reached out one arm to pat Nureongi’s neck, and the horse’s excitement seemed to quiet down a little.

Before Haeryeong could even breathe a sigh of relief, the stable master led the horse forward.

Clop, clop.

Startled by the slow gait, Haeryeong straightened his back and tightened his thighs.

“I shall hold the lead; please try to walk in a circle.”

‘How am I supposed to turn in a circle?’

Contrary to Haeryeong’s worry, the horse began to walk in a circular path around the stable master of its own accord.

Because the pace was slow, getting used to the swaying was not that difficult.

Though the place he couldn’t speak of—the area ravaged by the Emperor’s penis—remained tender and aching, it was endurable, and after a while, he looked somewhat like he was actually riding.

“Increase the speed a little more, Your Highness.”

“Nureongi. Run a bit faster.”

The stable master, unable to bring himself to laugh out loud, covered his face with his hand and spoke in a stifled voice.

“Give the reins a light shake, Your Highness.”

“Ah.”

Only then did he give the reins a slight flick, and Nureongi increased its walking speed.

Even though it was just a slightly faster walk, mounting a living thing was certainly no easy feat.

When Haeryeong, who had been struggling with his posture for some time, finally lifted his head, a cool breeze brushed past his sweat-drenched forehead.

From his elevated vantage point, he could see the wide-open sky.

The white clouds moving rapidly with the wind appeared closer than usual, making Haeryeong’s eyes go wide.

He must have moved his hands unconsciously, for the horse’s pace quickened further.

The sky zipped past his vision, and his long, trailing hair fluttered in the wind.

Every time the hair covering his back lifted and his body bounced atop the horse, an exclamation of wonder escaped Haeryeong’s lips.

He felt he could finally understand the horse’s feeling—that it would fall ill if it couldn’t run fast.

‘Living while feeling such a pleasant wind, one cannot help but miss it.’

Looking up at the high sky, Haeryeong blinked his moistening eyes rapidly.

His eyes kept growing wet because his own life, which had been more wretched than that of an animal, felt so sorrowful.

As Nureongi’s speed increased, an impatience stirred within Haeryeong, making him want to run even faster.

He wanted to gallop faster, further away.

Even if there was nothing waiting for him at the end.

No, he would rather run to a place where there was absolutely nothing.

Haeryeong continued to dream such futile dreams, only to push them back down into the depths of his heart.

Whenever he did, a hollow laugh at his own foolishness would escape him.

****

After riding for about half a sijin, he began to get the hang of it.

While galloping was still out of the question, he seemed to have learned how to minimize the impact on his body.

It was the result of his desperate effort to survive after the strain of enduring the Emperor’s weight.

When he finally dismounted, his legs were shaking uncontrollably.

His thighs and knees, exhausted from gripping the horse’s torso, trembled so much that Haeryeong stopped for a moment, pretending to catch his breath while patting Nureongi’s neck.

After stalling for a bit, strength finally returned to his legs.

“You worked hard carrying someone unfamiliar, Nureongi. I shall see you again tomorrow.”

He left his farewell with the horse, which was receiving his touch obediently, but as he turned away, his shoulder was suddenly yanked back.

Startled, Haeryeong turned around to find Nureongi had clamped its teeth onto his long overcoat and was pulling.

“Nureongi.”

The horse gave a short whinny and a nod, but the persistent creature refused to let go of his shoulder.

Haeryeong swayed like a fallen leaf in time with the horse’s movements.

“Let go.”

His legs were already shaky enough; why was this horse acting like this?

The boisterous laughter of the stable master reached Haeryeong’s ears.

“It seems this fellow is saddened by Your Highness’s departure. He is quite a pampered one, so please stroke him a few more times before you go, Your Highness.”

A low groan escaped Haeryeong’s lips as he continued to be shaken by the horse’s tugging.

“Ugh. I must be released before I can touch you. Let go.”

The horse, blinking its large, round eyes, finally released his shoulder.

It had bitten so hard that the fabric was already frayed from the horse’s teeth.

Haeryeong pulled at his clothes to check his shoulder and let out a sigh.

“You must not keep biting things, you troublesome beast.”

Haeryeong lightly scolded the horse while stroking its long bridge of its nose.

Whether it was pretending to be ignorant or truly couldn’t understand, the horse’s clear eyes remained perfectly calm.

However, it was difficult to even pet him properly as the horse kept lifting its head as if trying to rub its nose against his palm.

While Haeryeong was looking troubled, the stable master approached and offered the reins.

“If you hold the reins, he will likely settle down.”

“Thank you.”

The horse had been somewhat well-behaved while the stable master held him, but the moment Haeryeong took the reins, Nureongi stomped his hooves and let out a loud, piercing whinny.

Neigh. Snort.

He was even snorting roughly; what on earth was displeasing him?

Haeryeong soothed the horse with a troubled expression, patting its neck.

“Nureongi. Be good. Stay still for a moment.”

The horse’s muzzle fluttered as it exhaled in short, sharp bursts.

“Just why is he acting like this?”

Haeryeong finally lost his patience and asked the stable master for help.

The man, unable to hide the grin spreading across his face, replied hurriedly.

“It is because he likes you. He is acting like a spoiled child.”

Haeryeong looked at the still-restless horse with a look of disapproval.

“If he liked me twice as much, I fear he would stomp me into the ground.”

‘Is it true that he acts this way out of affection?’

It was hard to believe.

The horse thrust its damp nose toward Haeryeong and tried to chew on his trailing hair again.

Haeryeong managed to dodge the horse’s mouth by tilting his head back and slapped his hand down onto the bridge of its nose.

“If you continue to behave this way, I shall never come to see you again. I shall ride another, more well-behaved horse. So please, behave yourself.”

As he found himself pleading with the animal, a sigh escaped him, wondering why he had to go this far for a horse.

Haeryeong handed the reins back to the stable master and turned his back.

The horse let out a loud whinny behind him, but he did not look back.

The more he saw that horse, the more it reminded him of the Emperor.

The way it acted so willfully and seemed desperate to harass people—how could they be so identical?

Approaching Han Suyong, who was holding the hawk, Haeryeong swallowed a sigh.

‘If only I could be this firm toward the Emperor.’

‘But how could I, when he is the highest person under the heavens?’

Whenever he thought of the man, his chest felt stifled and he felt as though he were suffocating.

Struggling to catch his breath, he approached Changcheon; the hawk began to flutter its wings and hop atop Suyong’s arm.

It was as if the bird were desperate to come to Haeryeong.

Seeing the bird, the stiffness in his face quickly melted away.

“Changah. You have been a good bird and waited patiently.”

While receiving the assistance of another Black Shadow member to fit the glove, he extended his right arm, and the hawk rubbed its beak against his fingers.

“Good. Good bird. Come here.”

The hawk hopped nimbly onto his gloved left hand.

Haeryeong waited for the Black Shadow member to attach the feeding pouch to his waist and then pulled out a piece of meat.

“Since you are being so well-behaved, I cannot help but reward you.”

As Suyong watched Haeryeong gently stroke the cheek of Changcheon while the bird ate the meat, he spoke up cautiously.

“Um, Your Highness. I am hesitant to say this, but…”

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