Chapter 32: From Heaven to Hell

Su Yutao lowered her head, motionless.

But she held Qiansui a little tighter.

“All sewn up.”

Shen Nian tied a knot and cut the thread.

“Alright, take a look. Oh, right, you can’t see. Here, feel it.”

She turned the penguin around so its face faced Su Yutao.

Qiansui whispered in her ear, “I feel all round and puffy now…”

Su Yutao hugged the penguin back to her chest.

Furry.

Plump.

Warm.

She nodded in Shen Nian’s direction.

Shen Nian looked at her and chuckled softly, “You’re welcome.”

She stood up, gathered the torn doll and sewing kit, and put them away.

Su Yutao curled up on the sofa, holding Qiansui.

Qiansui murmured in her ear, “Shen Nian is so nice… much better than my master…”

Su Yutao didn’t speak.

But in her heart, she thought, ‘Yes. So good.’

Just then—

Shen Nian’s phone rang.

She glanced at the caller ID and answered, “Xiaoxue?”

Su Yutao’s whole body stiffened.

Qiansui fell silent too.

Shen Nian listened to the other side, her expression shifting.

Then she said, “That fast? All done?”

The other side said something.

Shen Nian glanced at Su Yutao. “She’s here with me, doing well. Just got her vaccinations.”

More words from the other end.

Shen Nian hummed a few times in acknowledgment.

Then she hung up.

She walked over and looked down at Su Yutao. “Xiaoxue is back. She’ll come get you in a bit.”

Su Yutao froze.

That person.

Was back.

The one who was who knows where, maybe just finished killing someone, still carrying the scent of blood.

She was back.

To pick her up.

Su Yutao hugged Qiansui tighter.

Her whole body began to tremble.

Shen Nian tossed her phone onto the coffee table and looked down at Su Yutao.

Su Yutao curled up on the sofa, holding Qiansui, still shaking.

Shen Nian frowned. “What are you shaking for? Xiaoxue’s coming to get you, aren’t you happy?”

Su Yutao shook her head.

Then nodded.

Then shook her head again.

She didn’t know how to say it.

Shen Nian clicked her tongue. “Alright, alright, stop shaking. Let’s eat first.”

She turned and walked toward the kitchen, carefree. “What do you want for lunch? I’ll whip up something simple.”

Su Yutao was stunned. She wasn’t going to ask?

Shen Nian’s voice drifted from the kitchen. “Anyway, you’re staying here. Eat when you’re hungry, sleep when you’re tired. I’ll talk to Xiaoxue about it later.”

Su Yutao hugged Qiansui tighter.

Her eyes stung.

…

Noon.

Shen Nian cooked.

Three dishes and a soup.

She brought the bowls out, set them on the coffee table, and looked at Su Yutao curled up on the sofa.

She paused. “Oh right, you can’t see.”

She walked over and helped Su Yutao sit by the coffee table.

Then she placed a bowl in her hand and a spoon. “Here, hold this. I’ll feed you.”

Su Yutao was taken aback.

Shen Nian had already scooped a spoonful of rice and brought it to her lips. “Open up.”

Su Yutao opened her mouth.

The rice was fed in.

Hot.

Fragrant with vegetables.

Shen Nian fed her while saying, “Braised pork. I might have made it a bit salty, but try it.”

Another spoonful. “Greens. These should be okay.”

Another spoonful. “Fish. No bones. I picked them out.”

Su Yutao chewed, her heart warm.

Qiansui whispered in her ear, “She’s so thoughtful… even picking out fish bones…”

After feeding her, Shen Nian cleared the bowls and tossed them into the dishwasher.

Then she flopped onto the sofa. “What do you want to do this afternoon?”

Su Yutao thought for a moment.

Seeing her silent, Shen Nian started brainstorming. “Listen to music? Watch TV? Sleep? Pick one.”

Qiansui excitedly whispered in Su Yutao’s ear, “Pick music! Pick music!”

Su Yutao pointed at her ear, then at her throat, and nodded in Shen Nian’s direction.

Shen Nian laughed. “Alright, music it is.”

She went to fiddle with the speakers.

Then music began to play.

A bit loud.

Qiansui hummed along in Su Yutao’s ear. “This is nice… I know this one… Chicken, you’re so beautiful…”

Su Yutao leaned back on the sofa, holding Qiansui.

Sunlight streamed through the floor-to-ceiling windows, warm and cozy.

The music flowed in her ears.

Shen Nian sprawled beside her, scrolling through her phone.

Quiet.

Warm.

Safe.

…

Evening.

Shen Nian cooked dinner again.

This time, noodles.

She helped Su Yutao sit by the coffee table and pushed the bowl toward her hand. “Noodles. Can you eat them yourself? Chopsticks or spoon?”

Su Yutao felt the rim of the bowl.

It was chopsticks.

She froze.

Shen Nian also paused. “Oh right, you can’t see chopsticks.”

She took the chopsticks away and replaced them with a spoon, placing it in Su Yutao’s hand. “Use a spoon. I cut the noodles short so you can scoop them.”

Su Yutao held the spoon and slowly took a scoop.

Warm.

She could eat.

Shen Nian ate her own noodles nearby, occasionally glancing at her. “Eat slowly. Don’t spill.”

After the meal, Shen Nian cleared the bowls and asked, “What do you want to do tonight? Watch a movie?”

Su Yutao nodded.

Shen Nian put on an animated film.

The volume was a bit loud.

Qiansui got excited in her ear, following the plot. “The main character’s out! That’s the bad guy!”

Su Yutao listened, the corners of her mouth twitching slightly.

The movie ended.

Shen Nian checked the time. “Nine o’clock. Time to sleep.”

She led Su Yutao to the bedroom.

The bed was soft.

The blanket was soft.

Shen Nian tucked her in. “Sleep.”

Su Yutao lay in bed, holding Qiansui.

Shen Nian walked to the door, about to turn off the light—

Su Yutao suddenly reached out her hand.

Groping in the air.

Shen Nian saw it.

She came back. “What’s wrong?”

Su Yutao’s hand touched hers.

Then she grabbed it.

And didn’t let go.

Shen Nian was startled for a moment.

Then she laughed lightly. “Scared to be alone?”

Su Yutao nodded.

Shen Nian clicked her tongue. “Fine. I’ll stay until you fall asleep.”

She sat down directly by the bed, pulled out her phone, and started scrolling.

Su Yutao curled up under the covers, holding Qiansui.

Shen Nian was right there.

The sound of scrolling.

An occasional laugh.

Very noisy.

But also very reassuring.

Su Yutao’s eyes slowly closed.

She fell asleep.

…

She didn’t know how long she’d slept.

Su Yutao was woken by Qiansui.

“Wake up, wake up! Someone’s here!”

Su Yutao jolted awake.

Outside the door.

Footsteps.

And—

The doorbell.

“Ding-dong.”

The sound of Shen Nian going to answer the door.

Then a voice came.

Gentle and soft.

“Niannian, I’m here to pick her up.”

Su Yutao’s whole body stiffened.

It was Lin Qingxue.

The Lin Qingxue from that night.

She was back…

Su Yutao sat up in bed, clutching Qiansui tightly.

Her whole body began to tremble.

Footsteps approached the bedroom.

The door opened.

Lin Qingxue stood at the doorway, still wearing that gentle expression. “Little mute, I’m here to take you home.”

Su Yutao shrank back on the bed, holding Qiansui.

She shook her head.

Shook it desperately.

Making whimpering sounds.

Didn’t want to go back.

Didn’t want to go back.

Shen Nian looked on, startled. “Xiaoxue, she doesn’t seem to want to go?”

Lin Qingxue chuckled softly. “It’s fine, just shy.”

She walked over and reached out to pull Su Yutao.

Su Yutao retreated.

Back into the corner of the bed.

Curling into a ball.

Her whimpering grew urgent and pitiful.

Shen Nian watched this scene and said nothing more.

She just leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed.

Lin Qingxue bent down and lifted Su Yutao from the corner.

Su Yutao went rigid in her arms.

Wanting to struggle.

But afraid.

That voice was right in her ear, soft, only she could hear: “Don’t move, or I won’t mind giving you another wound right now.”

Su Yutao trembled all over.

She didn’t dare move.

Shen Nian, watching from the side, said, “Xiaoxue, she has a wound on her arm. Be careful when you hold her.”

Lin Qingxue nodded. “Mm, I know.”

She carried Su Yutao out.

Su Yutao curled in her arms, holding Qiansui.

Tears wouldn’t come.

But something inside her felt shattered.

The warmth from before.

The safety from before.

The peace from before.

All gone.

At the door, Shen Nian called out, “Hey, Xiaoxue.”

Lin Qingxue turned back.

Shen Nian said, “If she’s not comfortable, she can always come stay with me for a few days.”

Lin Qingxue smiled. “Okay.”

The door closed.

Night wind blew against her face.

The sound of the car starting.

Qiansui whispered in her ear, “Don’t be afraid… I’m here…”

Su Yutao didn’t speak.

She just held Qiansui tighter.

Buried her face into the fluffy fur.

The car drove through the night.

Heading toward the place she feared.

From heaven.

Falling back to hell.

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