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Join the ServerIn the corner, Qiansui lay on the floor, not daring to move.
They watched Su Yutao kneel on the ground, a leash around her neck, her head tilted back like a lamb waiting to be slaughtered.
They watched Lin Qingxue lean close to her face, watched Su Yutao tremble, watched her shake her head desperately.
Qiansui wanted to call out to her, wanted to help, but they couldn’t make a sound.
They could only lie there, watching and waiting.
Waiting for dawn, for the daytime her to wake up.
Qiansui pressed their face into the floor and whispered, “Sorry… I can’t help you…”
Su Yutao couldn’t hear.
She could only hear her own heartbeat, fast, very fast, like it was about to explode.
She could only hear that person’s breathing, close and soft, like the wind.
She could only wait.
Wait for that person to bite down.
Wait for tonight to pass.
Wait for tomorrow.
Wait for the daytime her to wake up.
Lin Qingxue looked down at Su Yutao kneeling on the ground. Her face was tilted up, her mouth slightly open, her whole body shaking.
Her lips were thin, pressed into a line from fear. There were teeth marks on her lower lip where she had bitten herself, blood seeping out.
Lin Qingxue’s fingers gripped her chin, her thumb pressing against her lower lip, wiping away the blood.
Su Yutao’s mouth trembled even more under her fingers, like a leaf in the wind.
Lin Qingxue stared at that mouth for a long time.
Then she let go.
She didn’t bite down.
She pushed Su Yutao’s chin up, closing her mouth. Su Yutao’s teeth clicked together with a soft sound.
She was stunned.
‘She’s not going to bite anymore?’
Lin Qingxue straightened up and looked down at her.
The voice came from above, faint: “Want to die?”
Su Yutao knelt on the ground, her whole body stiffening.
Lin Qingxue looked at her reaction and let out a soft laugh.
The laugh was cold: “The way you were just now, you wanted to die, didn’t you?”
Su Yutao didn’t dare move.
‘Did she want to die?’
‘She didn’t know.’
‘She only knew she didn’t want to be treated like that, didn’t want to be leashed like a dog.’
‘Didn’t want her ear bitten.’
‘Didn’t want her mouth held open, waiting to be bitten.’
‘She didn’t know if that counted as wanting to die.’
‘Even she herself felt confused.’
Lin Qingxue crouched down to meet her eyes.
That hand reached out, pinched her cheek, and lifted her head.
The voice was right in front of her, very close, very soft: “If you die, the daytime me will be sad.”
Su Yutao didn’t react.
Lin Qingxue let go and stood up.
“So you’d better stay alive.”
She turned and walked away.
Footsteps headed toward the living room.
Su Yutao remained kneeling, still trembling all over.
‘She didn’t know why that person suddenly stopped biting, didn’t know why she said those things.’
‘She only knew she was still alive, still kneeling here, still with a rope around her neck.’
Lin Qingxue rummaged in the living room for a while, then the footsteps returned.
She was holding something and crouched down in front of Su Yutao.
Su Yutao could smell something pungent and medicinal, alcohol, iodine, cotton swabs.
Lin Qingxue glanced down at her leg. Her knee was scraped raw, blood smeared all over, with gravel and dirt mixed into the wound. It looked painful.
She frowned. Not out of pity, but disgust.
“Your leg,” she clicked her tongue. “How did this happen?”
Su Yutao didn’t dare answer.
Lin Qingxue didn’t wait for an answer either.
She reached out, pulled Su Yutao’s leg straight, and pressed it to the floor.
Su Yutao’s knee was exposed. The movement pulled at the wound, making her gasp in pain.
Lin Qingxue held her leg down with one hand and unscrewed a bottle with the other.
Cool liquid poured onto the wound.
Su Yutao’s whole body jerked. It hurt.
‘Not cool, it was the pain of alcohol seeping into the wound, burning, tearing.’
Her mouth fell open, a hoarse rasping sound escaping her throat. Her hands reached for her leg, trying to cover it, to block the liquid.
Lin Qingxue grabbed both her wrists and pinned them to the floor.
The voice was right above her, calm: “Don’t move. I’m treating the wound.”
Su Yutao couldn’t move.
Her hands were pinned, her leg pressed down. She lay sprawled on the floor like a butterfly pinned to a board.
‘She could only feel the pain.’
Alcohol poured over the wound, washing out the gravel and mud.
The pain darkened her vision, forced her to gasp for air, made her whole body convulse, tremble, spasm.
Her mouth was open, but no sound came out, only a rasping wheeze, like a chick with its throat squeezed.
Lin Qingxue just held her down, watching her hurt, watching her convulse, watching her gasp.
Her eyes were flat, as if she were looking at something that needed to be dealt with.
The alcohol finished rinsing.
Lin Qingxue let go, picked up a cotton swab, and cleaned around the wound.
Iodine was applied. It was cool, not as painful.
Su Yutao lay on the floor, panting heavily. Her whole body was drenched in sweat, as if she’d been pulled out of water.
Lin Qingxue packed up, stood, walked to the living room, and put the first aid kit away.
Footsteps returned.
She stood in front of Su Yutao for a moment, then bent down and picked up the rope from the floor.
She looked at Su Yutao on the other end of the rope, then at the rope in her hand, and gave a soft laugh.
“I’ll add memories.”
She wound the rope around her hand twice.
“All these wounds of yours, Zhou Ye did them.”
“The cigarette burns, the bitten ear, the leg, he did it all.”
She paused.
“It was all him.”
“Nothing to do with you.”
“Nothing to do with me.”
Su Yutao lay on the floor, listening to these words. Something clogged her heart.
‘Zhou Ye.’
‘That person was going to pin all of this on Zhou Ye.’
‘She didn’t know what would happen to Zhou Ye. She only knew that person would never let the daytime her know the truth.’
‘Never.’
Lin Qingxue tossed the rope aside, walked to the bed, and lay down.
The voice drifted down from the bed, faint: “Today, as punishment for running around, you’ll sleep on the floor.”
The light went out.
Darkness.
Su Yutao lay on the floor, hugging herself.
Qiansui was in the corner. She couldn’t reach them.
She could only lie there, curled up, waiting.
‘She didn’t know what she was waiting for.’
‘For dawn?’
‘For the daytime her to wake up?’
‘For that gentle person to ask if she was hungry?’
‘For that person to help her with medicine, tuck her in, say “Don’t be afraid”?’
‘She was silent.’
‘She remembered what happened in the alley.’
‘That woman, Luo Qianning, had picked her up, squeezed her neck, burned her with a cigarette.’
‘She had thought Lin Qingxue came to save her.’
‘She had thought that person rushed over, drove off Luo Qianning, picked her up, to save her.’
‘No.’
‘She came to pick up something.’
‘To pick up her belonging.’
‘Luo Qianning had touched her belonging, and she was angry.’
‘Luo Qianning had damaged her belonging, and she wanted to take it back.’
‘She wasn’t here to save her. She was here to take back her thing.’
‘She was a thing.’
‘An object.’
‘The dog that person kept.’
‘She wasn’t human.’
‘She had never been human.’
Su Yutao lay on the floor, burying her face in her arms.
‘Tears wouldn’t come, but her heart was bleeding.’
The adventure continues! If you loved this chapter, How to Avoid Regression is a must-read. Click here to start!
Read : How to Avoid Regression
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I don’t understand why she is still so terrified of death, considering she simply regresses to the beginning of the story; she ought to be more afraid of having to suffer and go through it all over again