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Join the Server“But… but you have to complete the mission to go back…”
Qiansui’s voice grew softer and softer.
“The main system said you can’t go back until the mission is finished. If you go back now…”
It hesitated, its voice trembling with tears.
“If you die now, you’ll have to start over from the beginning.”
Su Yutao froze.
“That means… going back to the moment you first transmigrated, that rainy night. You were blind and mute, huddled in a corner, with nothing. Then…”
Qiansui’s voice became even quieter.
“Then you’d have to relive it all. Every single thing. All over again.”
“And… in that state, you’d most likely be picked up by Lin Qingxue again.”
Su Yutao’s breath caught.
Start over.
Return to that rainy night.
Relive everything.
The beatings, the threats, being kept like a dog.
All of it, again.
She remembered that rainy night, the sound of those stabs, that person saying “Get lost.”
She remembered Lin Qingxue crouching down and asking, “Why are you squatting here alone?” She remembered the hot soybean milk, the two meat buns.
She remembered Shen Nian feeding her, stitching up Qiansui.
She remembered that person choking her, squeezing her shoulders, biting her hand, stepping on her head.
All of it, again.
Su Yutao hugged Qiansui tighter.
She didn’t want that.
She couldn’t go through it again.
She couldn’t take it anymore.
Why was she being tortured like this?
Qiansui whispered in her ear, “So… you can’t die. If you die, you’ll start over. All the suffering you’ve endured will be in vain, and you’ll have to suffer it all again.”
Su Yutao buried her face in Qiansui’s fur.
She didn’t want to die.
But she didn’t want to live either.
She just wanted to go home.
But she couldn’t.
She could only stay here.
Stay by that person’s side.
Wait for the main quest to be completed.
Wait to defeat the antagonist.
Wait to go home.
Wait for a very long time.
Qiansui softly whispered in her ear, “I’ll be with you. Always with you. Wait until you finish the mission, then we’ll go home. With money, with three wishes. You want to kill her? Kill her. Want to go back? Go back. Do whatever you want. But you have to live. Only by living can you go back.”
Su Yutao hugged Qiansui tighter.
Live.
She had to live.
Only by living could she go back.
She remembered Xiao Douzi, the headmistress grandma, the picture book she never gave away.
She had to go back.
She had to live and go back.
She couldn’t start over.
The suffering she endured couldn’t be in vain.
The person beside her turned over.
Su Yutao froze.
Breathing still soft and even.
Not awake.
Su Yutao breathed a sigh of relief.
She held Qiansui, staring into the eternal darkness.
She had to live.
Live and go back.
Go back with Qiansui.
Qiansui whispered in her ear, “Sleep now. Tomorrow you still have to live.”
Su Yutao hugged Qiansui tighter.
Tomorrow she still had to live.
And the day after.
And the day after that.
Always until the day she could go back.
Live, live, live. I can’t die. I absolutely can’t die. I have to go on living…
She closed her eyes.
Though they were always closed.
But this time, she seemed to see something.
Not light. Something else.
It was the path home.
Far away, very dark, but she knew it was there.
Su Yutao curled up on the bed, holding Qiansui, and didn’t sleep all night.
Just before dawn, the breathing of the person beside her changed—not like at night, but waking up.
The daytime version was about to wake.
Su Yutao tensed all over, waiting.
The person beside her turned over, stretched, and a gentle voice sounded, husky from just waking up:
“Morning…”
Su Yutao didn’t move.
Lin Qingxue rubbed her eyes, glanced at her, and smiled: “Why are you curled up like that? Didn’t sleep well?”
Su Yutao shook her head.
Lin Qingxue didn’t press further. She threw off the covers, got out of bed, and went to wash up.
The sound of footsteps faded, and the sound of running water began.
Qiansui whispered in Su Yutao’s ear, “She’s gone.”
Su Yutao breathed a sigh of relief.
Qiansui said again, “You didn’t sleep all night.”
Su Yutao didn’t answer.
Qiansui was silent for a moment, then that soft voice rang out again, carrying a strange hesitation:
“Um… I need to tell you something.”
Su Yutao waited.
Qiansui’s voice grew softer: “I checked the mail again last night. The main system sent the main storyline.”
Su Yutao’s heart rose.
Qiansui paused, then said, “Do you… do you want to hear it?”
Su Yutao nodded.
Qiansui took a deep breath—though it didn’t need to breathe, it still took a deep breath to seem more professional.
“The main storyline of this world goes like this: As the female lead, you have a very tragic start, the kind that makes readers cry.
You transmigrate, blind and mute, huddled in a corner on a rainy night, then you encounter a killer who lets you go.”
Su Yutao nodded.
She had already experienced that.
“Then the next day, you go to the police station, get taken in by the police, stay there for a few days. The police try to find your family but can’t.
You have no identity, no household registration, nothing can be found. In the end, the police have no choice but to let you go.”
Su Yutao was stunned.
Police station?
She had never been to a police station.
Qiansui continued,
“Then you leave the police station, walk along the blind lane, looking for food. Then you get found by some local thugs. They see you’re blind and mute, and start extorting you. You have no money, so they beat you up, punch and kick you.”
Su Yutao’s hands began to tremble.
She remembered that local thug, that man called Huang San.
The one who cut off this body’s allowance, the one who sent people to bully this body.
Qiansui looked at her like that, its voice even softer: “Then your leg gets broken. You crawl into an alley, curl up, waiting for someone to rescue you. Then the daytime Lin Qingxue passes by and takes you in.”
Su Yutao felt a pang of pain. So in the end, she still ended up being picked up by Lin Qingxue? She couldn’t escape it after all?
She remembered Lin Qingxue crouching down and asking her,
“Why are you squatting here alone?”
Remembered that hot soybean milk, those two meat buns.
So that’s how it was.
She had been beaten, thrown in an alley, picked up by Lin Qingxue.
So that was the main storyline.
Qiansui saw her like that and said hastily, “But you’re different now! You didn’t go to the police station. You were directly picked up by Lin Qingxue. You weren’t beaten, your leg isn’t broken. You’re in her house now.”
Su Yutao hugged Qiansui tighter.
She hadn’t been beaten, her leg wasn’t broken.
But she had been beaten by someone else.
Had her shoulder crushed by someone else, her hand bitten, her head stepped on.
She didn’t know whether to be grateful or to cry.
Qiansui’s voice carried a hint of confusion: “But… the main story says you have to get beaten before you meet the daytime Lin Qingxue. You’ve already met her, so does that mean you don’t have to get beaten?”
Su Yutao didn’t know.
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