Chapter 54: The Breath Between Them

It seemed Seha had missed the right moment to slow for the traffic light.

Even with the signal already turning yellow, he maintained his speed until he suddenly slammed on the brakes.

Screech—!!

The car lurched violently.

The grating sound of tires scraping against the road pierced their ears.

The instant he saw Haesoo’s head snap forward beside him, Seha instinctively threw out his arm.

“Ah!”

Their car came to a stop with only the slightest safe distance left between them and the vehicle ahead.

Had he reacted even a fraction of a second later, they might have crashed.

Seha himself didn’t even have time to pitch forward toward the steering wheel.

The commotion lasted only a moment.

Time, however, continued on as if nothing had happened.

The navigation system calmly announced that it was six o’clock.

The moment the car stopped and Seha hurriedly turned toward the passenger seat, he realized that without even thinking, his arm had stretched across Haesoo’s chest to shield him.

“Ah… I’m sorry. Are you alright?”

“……”

“I’m sorry. My mind was somewhere else…”

While the light remained red, Seha hurriedly checked on Haesoo.

Even if he’d forgotten everything himself, Haesoo still remembered the car accident perfectly.

Seeing him sitting there frozen stiff, gripping nothing but his seatbelt, Seha clicked his tongue softly.

There was no point making excuses.

This was his fault.

Whether it had become a serious accident or not didn’t matter.

“My head was somewhere else. Are you hurt anywhe—”

“This.”

Haesoo finally forced a few words through lips that had seemed sealed shut.

“Don’t do this.”

His eyes were fixed on the arm that still blocked the space in front of him.

His trembling hand slowly reached out before finally wrapping around Seha’s firm forearm.

“Please… don’t.”

Cold sweat beaded across his forehead.

At last, tears spilled from his eyes.

His steady breathing disappeared almost instantly, and even the calm posture he’d been forcing himself to maintain completely collapsed.

A moment later, he slowly let go of Seha’s arm.

Clenching both fists tightly, he lowered his head.

One warm tear after another landed on his thighs.

Only then did Seha realize he’d made a mistake.

He never once thought, I was trying to protect you, so why are you scolding me?

Instead…

He felt as though he understood exactly what Haesoo was feeling.

“I’m not grateful for things like this.”

Years ago, Choi Haesoo had lost Kwon Seha in exactly the same way.

Perhaps the life he’d gained after losing Seha had never truly felt worth living.

Whatever Seha back then might have thought…

To the Haesoo standing here now, that was the truth.

Even his trembling voice was enough to reveal how devastated he was.

Without realizing it, Seha found himself speaking to the version of himself that had disappeared from those forgotten memories.

Choi Haesoo never really survived.

The urge to make sure Haesoo wasn’t hurt during that sudden stop had been completely instinctive.

Even if he could go back just a few minutes, Seha knew he’d do exactly the same thing again.

That realization left even him momentarily dazed.

“Seha… Mr. Kwon Seha… I…”

After hurriedly wiping away his tears, Haesoo cleared his throat several times.

His breathing refused to settle into a normal rhythm.

Within moments, it became frighteningly irregular.

The fist that had been curled quietly in his lap suddenly began pounding hard against his own chest, as if it had nowhere else to strike.

“What’s wrong? Is it hard to breathe?”

“I… ah… j-just… wait…”

Far beyond simple discomfort, Haesoo struggled like someone whose airway was closing shut.

His upper body jerked violently with every desperate gasp before collapsing again.

It looked as though his breathing might stop altogether at any second.

The color drained from his fingertips until they turned ghostly white.

Before long, the traffic light changed to green.

Ignoring everything happening on the road, Seha turned the steering wheel and pulled the car toward the shoulder.

The blaring horns around them made Haesoo flinch violently.

Biting down on his lip, Seha stopped the car as quickly as he could.

“Wait. Stop hitting yourself!”

He bit the inside of his cheek as he frantically searched the car.

There wasn’t a single thing inside that might help calm Haesoo’s breathing.

No plastic bag.

Not even an envelope or a paper shopping bag.

Haesoo’s face, already frighteningly pale, seemed to lose even more color.

Seha couldn’t bear to simply sit there and watch.

Did Haesoo still know that the person in front of him was Kwon Seha, even with his eyes squeezed shut?

Right now…

That didn’t matter.

Seha cupped Haesoo’s face, his lips parting as he abandoned every other option he wished he’d had.

Only one idea remained.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

“Haah… h-haah!”

“…If you can’t hold on until then, hit my shoulder instead.”

With that brief murmur, Seha pressed his lips against Haesoo’s.

Haesoo was desperately clawing at himself in pain, so Seha used all his strength to hold him still.

Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been able to stop the fists pounding mercilessly against Haesoo’s chest, nor the frantic attempts to push him away.

In the struggle, the coat that had been draped over Haesoo the entire time slipped silently to the floor beneath their feet.

His rigid body began to ache from being so tense.

Without realizing it, he reached toward Seha.

Even then, it was as if he was trying not to.

His hand slipped away several times before it finally found him.

“Mmh…!”

At first, the kiss only made it feel harder to breathe.

Instinctively, Haesoo tried to pull Seha away, gasping desperately.

There was almost no strength in the arms pushing against him.

Even so, Seha could feel every violent tremor shaking Haesoo’s body where they touched.

Unable to overcome Seha’s far stronger grip, Haesoo eventually grabbed fistfuls of his clothes instead.

His fingers clutched desperately, as though refusing to believe that he and Kwon Seha were truly sharing a kiss.

Haesoo knew exactly what Seha was doing.

He was breathing for him.

A broken whimper escaped between their brushing lips.

Haesoo’s face disappeared beneath Seha’s broad hands.

For the first time, Seha held Haesoo’s face in his palms.

He stroked it gently, over and over again.

It was almost like a silent plea.

Please… breathe normally again.

Their faces and hands were damp, whether from tears or saliva running from the corners of their mouths.

Ignoring the pressure of their tongues colliding, Seha continued giving him breath after breath.

He stole away the frantic exhalations tormenting Haesoo.

All the while, he kept caressing his face.

Only after a long…

A painfully long time…

Did Haesoo finally begin to calm down.

His breathing no longer sounded as though it might stop at any moment.

He wasn’t writhing in pain anymore.

His small body merely rose and fell with each shaky breath.

“Haah… ah… ah…”

“…Are you alright?”

His ragged breathing gradually settled into something quieter.

Only then did Haesoo seem to fully realize what had just happened.

His tear-filled eyes wandered aimlessly before finally stopping on Kwon Seha.

“Y-Yes… I’m… I’m alright…”

“Hah… thank goodness.”

The moment Haesoo finally began breathing properly again, all the tension drained from Seha’s body.

He tried to pull back, straightening the waist and upper body that had been twisted over Haesoo.

Or rather…

He tried to.

Haesoo’s head, now limp with exhaustion, fell heavily against him.

The back of his neck glistened with sweat.

A strained voice reached Seha’s ear.

“Ugh… I’m okay, but…”

Unable to hold himself together after everything, Haesoo burst into tears all over again.

Seha lowered his gaze toward the man buried against his chest.

Without hesitation, he lifted a hand and gently stroked Haesoo’s face again, just as he had moments earlier.

His skin wasn’t merely warm.

It was burning hot.

After fighting for every breath and enduring everything that had just happened with Seha, it was no surprise.

“Come here.”

He knew exactly what Haesoo must be thinking.

Because of that, he couldn’t look at him with his usual irritation.

Nor could he act as though Haesoo were a nuisance.

Instead, Seha gently pulled Haesoo’s head against his chest.

The man who had stopped crying in front of Kwon Seha long ago was now sobbing helplessly once again.

And it was all because of Kwon Seha.

“Hic… mm… ngh…”

“Just focus on breathing. Crying isn’t going to help you right now.”

For the first time in a long while, Choi Haesoo allowed himself to cry in Kwon Seha’s arms.

Seha had only wanted to comfort someone who had been terrified.

Instead, he’d only made him cry even harder.

Unable to shake the guilt flooding his chest, Seha lowered his brows.

His eyes fell on the damp tear stains soaking into his shirt.

The tiny wet spots looked as though they had been carefully dotted there by Haesoo himself.

Haesoo noticed them too.

Just as his breathing began to steady, he hurriedly brushed at the stains with flustered hands.

He mistakenly thought Seha’s troubled expression was because of them.

A helpless laugh escaped Seha before he could stop it.

Today, he’d seen countless sides of Haesoo he’d never seen before.

So many, in fact, that it almost felt unfair for them all to appear in a single day.

Today’s Haesoo was… strangely fascinating.

The moment their eyes met, Seha quickly stopped smiling.

His lips returned to a straight line, awkwardness settling across his face.

Did I laugh too much?

More than anything…

It was the first time he’d ever laughed so openly in front of Choi Haesoo.

Embarrassed, he cleared his throat.

“Don’t let your mind wander.”

“……”

“Slowly… breathe out again. That’s it.”

He hid the thoughts he truly wanted to say behind words he didn’t really mean.

Haesoo didn’t look at him as though wondering what kind of strange person he was.

Instead, he gazed at Kwon Seha with those unbearably lingering eyes once again.

The moment their eyes met, Haesoo quietly lowered his gaze.

“That’s right. Good job.”

“……”

“I’m sorry. I… brought back bad memories for you, Mr. Choi Haesoo.”

A large hand gently stroked up and down his back.

Without the slightest hesitation, Seha used the sleeve of his shirt to wipe the sweat-damp hair away from Haesoo’s forehead.

Beside him, Haesoo slowly closed his tired eyes.

Just as he was finally beginning to calm down…

The navigation screen connected to Seha’s phone lit up with an incoming call.

The loud vibration instantly pulled both of them back to reality.

[Jiwoo]

Haesoo’s eyes, which had been drifting shut, slowly opened again the moment he saw the name on the screen.

The two of them glanced at each other almost at the same time.

An unmistakable awkwardness settled over both their faces.

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