Chapter 64: Under Everyone’s Eyes

“Still, I liked it.”

While Su-ha was steadying his emotions, Chaewon spoke in a slightly smaller voice, almost like a whisper. Su-ha listened closely to his voice, and Chaewon continued.

“It’s my first time being exhausted from exercising instead of working. It’s strange. Being tired from work feels different from this.”

Chaewon’s face, as he spoke, genuinely looked excited. Suppressing the same urge to reach out and ruffle his hair, Su-ha quietly listened to what he had to say.

“It’s hard… but it’s a good kind of hard. I hope I can work hard and get used to it quickly.”

“…You’ll get used to it soon.”

“Yes. I’ll do my best.”

“Combat training will start after about a week of physical conditioning. And starting next week, telekinesis training will resume on alternating days as well, so… it’ll probably be a tough schedule.”

“Yes. It’s okay. I want to start as soon as possible.”

Su-ha worried that Chaewon might feel overwhelmed by the process, but Chaewon instead looked as if he wanted to begin everything as soon as possible. Su-ha watched his face quietly for a moment, then gave a small nod of his chin and spoke.

“Let’s eat first. You need to eat well to endure the training.”

“Yes! You too, enjoy your meal, Su-ha.”

By the time the conversation ended, Chaewon was speaking almost like a kindergarten child responding to a teacher. It was cute. Adorable. Unable to do anything about the emotions that were now rising instantly and uncontrollably, Su-ha began eating as well.

And this time, Chaewon quietly stole a glance at Su-ha’s face. In his own way, Chaewon was still fixated on the smile he had seen on Su-ha’s face earlier. He liked how Su-ha looked so relaxed and genuinely happy when he was with him.

As the gradual changes became clearly visible, his heart kept fluttering no matter how much he tried to stop it. Even though it wasn’t something he had achieved through his own efforts, he still felt strangely proud.

After all, if he had completely ruined everything, wouldn’t Su-ha have been unable to smile like that in front of him?

Unaware of the inner turmoil Su-ha was going through, Chaewon began his meal hoping that everything would continue just as it was.

****

“You’re saying you really haven’t looked even once?”

Eunho asked, raising his voice in disbelief. After going in and out of massive machines as instructed while wearing a patient gown and undergoing a loud, exhaustive series of tests, Chaewon sat there with a dazed expression and nodded at Eunho’s question.

Chaewon had to undergo regular examinations under the supervision of the Esper Management Team.

At Chaewon’s answer, Eunho shook his head back and forth. His expression clearly said he still couldn’t believe it. Even though he hadn’t done anything wrong, Chaewon felt oddly compelled to make excuses and opened his mouth.

“I’ve been busy with training and other things… and Su-ha said it wasn’t really a good idea to look it up myself.”

“I agree with that too, but… weren’t you curious at all?”

Eunho spoke while reviewing and saving the test results. What he meant was how, with the world making such a fuss over Esper Lee Chaewon, he could possibly have gone this long without looking up any reactions. Chaewon shrugged awkwardly.

“I was a little curious, but I thought it would blow over pretty quickly anyway…”

“No way. As soon as the National Disaster Agency posted the notice about an upcoming press conference, it got even crazier.”

Listening to Eunho, who sounded oddly excited, Chaewon sank into thought for a moment. He could ignore bad comments easily enough, but he suddenly worried about what if there were too many good ones.

If people raised their expectations too high, they’d obviously be disappointed when they saw him at the press conference.

There would surely be people saying unpleasant things, but he could just brush those off. Still, the thought of disappointing people who watched him with goodwill and hope felt like it would hurt a little.

It wasn’t that he craved popularity; betraying others’ positive expectations weighed on his mind.

Maybe because he’d rarely been on the receiving end of such expectations in his life, even though he knew they were far more than he deserved, he wanted to protect those precious feelings. It was laughable, in a way.

When Chaewon fell silent, Eunho lifted his gaze from the test data and looked at him. Sitting on the edge of the large bed, Chaewon wore an expression that was hard to read.

Because the bed had been raised for the examination, his feet, unable to reach the floor, swung lightly in the air.

It was almost startling to realize again that, for an esper, he was far too small and thin. At a glance, he looked so fragile that it was hard to imagine him wielding any strength at all.

And yet that very person possessed such an extraordinary power, one that was visually dazzling, no less. No matter how much Eunho thought about it, he couldn’t come up with a single reason why people wouldn’t love him.

A terminal prognosis in the past? Side effects? All of that only served as fuel for people to love him even more fervently. Ironically, the more he suffered while using his powers, the more people would cheer.

Chaewon seemed worried that people would be disappointed by how insignificant he was, but Eunho was more concerned that people might idolize and deify him too excessively. Either extreme would be bad for the person involved.

Eunho slowly approached Chaewon. Seeing those gentle eyes reflexively look up at him made him think that no matter what this person did, he hoped he would live happily from now on.

“People are going to love you endlessly, and they’re going to be disappointed in you endlessly too, Chaewon.”

During his time on the Esper Management Team, Eunho had seen espers collapse not because of monsters or enemy espers, but because of people’s words. In moments like that, their superhuman powers were completely useless.

Some were shattered beyond recovery by the knife-sharp words of the public, who freely raised their expectations and cast them aside just as freely.

Many espers who visited the counseling facilities prepared at the center confessed that, more than fear of death, they felt greater dread and exhaustion from the raw reactions of the public.

“Don’t worry about people being disappointed. What you have to do as an esper is clear dungeons or stop crimes, not satisfy their expectations.”

Eunho knew that Chaewon carried an excessively heavy sense of responsibility compared to his circumstances. It was obvious just from the way he approached training.

He worried that someone who already pushed himself so hard might become even harsher on himself if he were exposed to negative evaluations from others.

Chaewon blinked a few times and met Eunho’s gaze. He could feel Eunho’s warm concern without reservation. Then, smiling softly, Chaewon spoke.

“Yes. I will.”

It was true that he was still worried about what lay ahead. Just thinking about standing in front of people at the press conference made his heart pound so hard he could barely sleep.

But he had endured even harder times, times when no one worried about him at all. Compared to those days, it almost felt indulgent to complain now, when everything was so much better.

Faces of people who cared about his safety and emotions, things even he himself hadn’t fully considered, passed through his mind one by one. And when the face of his guide, Su-ha, finally surfaced, warmth spread from a corner of his once-heavy heart.

“Thank you, Eunho.”

After offering his sincere thanks, Chaewon turned his gaze toward the door. There was no real reason for it, but suddenly, he wanted to see Su-ha.

****

“Jin Su-ha.”

On his way toward the examination room where Chaewon was being tested, Su-ha stopped at the unpleasantly familiar voice calling out from behind him.

“So where’s our Esper Lee Chaewon?”

The person who spoke before Su-ha had even turned around was none other than Gi-yoon.

Relieved that Chaewon wasn’t with him at the moment, Su-ha slowly turned around. He’d stopped by the dorm for an errand and had sent Chaewon to the examination room alone, which was why he’d been hurrying back.

“Hello.”

Deliberately ignoring the question about Chaewon, Su-ha greeted him with a blank expression. Gi-yoon openly scanned behind Su-ha’s back before speaking again.

“Where’s Lee Chaewon?”

“Why are you looking for Chaewon?”

“What, do I need a reason to look for him? Maybe I just want to see his face.”

“Chaewon has a scheduled appointment.”

“And what kind of appointment takes priority over one he already had with me?”

In that last remark, Gi-yoon’s purpose in seeking Chaewon became blatantly clear. Ye-seon had given him a heads-up beforehand, but seeing Gi-yoon actually press the issue still caught Su-ha off guard.

Why was someone who never spared even a shred of interest for people outside his own team involving himself so deeply with Chaewon?

If he couldn’t guess at all, it might have been better, but the fact that he understood exactly where that interest came from made it all the more unpleasant for Su-ha.

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